i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
