hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize