Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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