I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
