hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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