All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
