so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize