she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
