and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
