I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
