I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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