You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
It's blow job season.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
