what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Randomize
