Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
