Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
