There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize