"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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