I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
