He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize