I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize