Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize