You just made me feel so damn special
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
