Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize