i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize