they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
