similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize