I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
