I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
