Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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