"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
3pm strippers are depressing
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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