also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
only if we run a train.
done.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Randomize