I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
