I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Randomize
