I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
