im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
