The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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