I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
