dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Randomize