so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
