just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Lo siento on account of my penis...
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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