You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize