Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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