Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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