Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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