roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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