Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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