It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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