How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
