Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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