Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
