i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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